What It Means to Be the Church: Embodying the Love, Not Perfection

GUEST WRITER: SARAH KNAPTON

Heidi, a friend of mine, recently told me about a community-building activity she does with her friends. Once a year, she and a core group of friends rent a cabin. Each person invites one new friend they have made within the last year to come with them.

Heidi calls it her friendship web. It is the idea that as life goes on, you want your old friends to stay with you and your new friends to know your old friends. It is a web to expand, welcome, and celebrate more people into your community.

Acts 2: A Vision of Shared Life and Belonging

When reading Acts 2:43-47, we glimpse what the early church was like. 

“Awe came upon everyone, because many wonders and signs were being done by the apostles. All who believed were together and all things in common; they would sell their possessions and goods and distribute the proceeds to all, as any had needs. Day by day, as they spent much time together in the temple, they broke bread at home and ate their food with glad and generous hearts, praising God and having the goodwill of all the people. And day by day the Lord added to their numbers those who were being saved.”

Based on this scripture, I don’t think the early church was stuck on dogma, numbers, or money. Rather, the early church was about inclusive community. It was expanding its web of support and helping people find a place where they could belong.

From Perfectionism to Embodied Love

As a youth in 2010, I was told that to be the church was to be an example. I internalized a script that said I was to be perfect, without sin, and always ready to evangelize my faith. To stand out as God’s divine child meant giving up everything earthly. This impacted what I could wear, what I could watch and listen to, my grades, and even who I could be friends with. The posture got me through high school (barely), but it started to crumble in college.

This idea of being the church by being an example caused me and many friends in my community a lot of mental harm, physical harm, and shame. It wasn’t until I was in seminary, at the age of 23, that I began to deconstruct my faith and focus on the acts of Jesus. Through this process I unearthed that to be the church is actually to embody inclusive love.

Embodying Love Means…

I am beloved and enough.
My neighbor is beloved and enough.
My enemy is beloved and belongs.
Every living creature is beloved and belongs.
I don’t have to have everything figured out.
I don’t have to be perfect. 

To be the church is to treat people (whether “in” the church or “outside” the church) as beloved because we are beloved and we belong as the imperfect humans we are. We should be proud to be the church because it is a place where people are supported, loved, celebrated, and cherished for the beloved, complicated humans that they are. 

You Are Beloved, Enough, and You Belong

If I could tell my younger self what it really means to be the church, I would start by making sure I knew that I was beloved and enough—even with my braces, severe acne, and slow reading comprehension. Then, I would tell myself to be curious about my classmates. Ask questions about their lives and experiences in the world. Be open-minded about how their lives are different and notice how our lives are similar. It often only takes one curious, open-ended question for someone to switch from stranger to friend.

To be the church is to embody love and cast our webs of friendship. It is to be curious about one another and to ask open-ended questions because our foundations are the same. We are all beloved, enough, and belong in the greater community that is humanity.