Family

Shocking News About Gratitude and Raising Healthy Kids

Gratitude has a lot to teach us about healthy kids. Help your child blossom by simply bringing awareness to gratitude in your family’s life.

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We’ve even thought up three easy things you can do to invite gratitude into your family’s rhythm and transform your child’s life.

FREEBIE! And if you’d like to download a free printable Gratitude Fridge Sign to help you remember 5 ways of inspiring gratitude in children, you can click this link to get your free Gratitude Fridge Sign.

How are you cultivating gratitude in your home? Share with us in the comments below!

Why Does Gratitude Matter?

It turns out gratitude sparks a whole bunch of goodness and health in our lives! The wisdom of our spiritual foremothers and forefathers is even showing up today in academic research.

Over at UC Davis, Harvard, and Berkeley, there’s buzz about the massive benefits of being thankful. Are you ready for this?

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Gratitude…

can lower blood pressure and improve immune health
can reduce lifetime risk for depression, anxiety and substance abuse disorders
is a key resiliency factor in the prevention of suicide
can decrease the likelihood of smoking, alcohol abuse
blocks toxic emotions like envy, resentment, regret, and depression
is associated with healthy levels of cholesterol
can facilitate more efficient sleep
reduces stress hormones
contributes to a healthy nervous system
lowers levels of creatinine (an indicator of the kidney’s ability to filter waste in the body)
can improve diet and exercise routines
improves satisfaction in relationships
can create a more generalized sense of optimism and joy

My goodness! That’s an overwhelming number of perks. Do you want to help your children access these benefits with simple practices? Of course! Read on to invite more gratitude into your child’s life and your life, too.

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Give Together

Give things, talents, time, and resources to others, particularly those in need. Make this a common practice your child takes part in. Not only does this inspire gratitude; over time, actively giving to others shows them their worth as it relates to others. And it creates a habit of generosity.

Consumerism, in order to survive, tells us that we aren’t enough and we have too little. Giving to others helps a child see through this myth. In reality, we are enough and we each have so much to give.

Brainstorm with your child about what they have to give, e.g.: stuffed animals, clothes, money, time, or talents. Then, pay attention to their passions. Listen to what in the world makes them sad and angry. Pair this with their passion and equip them to make a difference.

Children learn the concept of abundance as they see just how much they already have. And awareness of abundance breeds gratitude.

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Model Empathy

Research is showing us that there’s an interesting correlation between empathy and gratitude. The way adults relate to children may have an impact on their ability to gratitude as they grow.

Older children who practice gratitude were more likely as young children to have understood the emotions of others. So, help children notice and interpret others’ emotional experiences.

Talk with children about how they feel and why, even from the beginning of life. Also, model this as you reflect with them on your own feelings.

Research tells us that when caregivers lay this foundation for emotional intelligence they simultaneously plant seeds that will grow gratitude later.

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Express It Together

Consistently express as a family what it is that you are each, and collectively, thankful for. For example, say grace before eating. Do bedtime prayers. Or take time during meals or drives to and from school to share things you’re grateful for.

It doesn’t need to be a big production. Remind your children (and yourself) that it isn’t about saying it the right way. Simply give voice to the gifts you all come across in your day.

Sharing special times of gratitude brings your child’s attention to happy and hopeful moments during their day. Consequently, they’ll form neuropathways that encourage gratitude, joy, generosity, and health going forward. Powerful gifts for our kids, right?!

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We hope your family discovers even more ways of inviting gratitude into your home! You are already giving your child treasures to take with them each time you practice gratitude. And what will the world look like once these resilient, hopeful and strong kids grow into adults? I can only imagine and we can’t wait to be witness to their greatness.

Happy Thanksgiving to those celebrating. May it be rich and restful and bursting with gratitude.

Craft a Morning Routine That Will Revolutionize Your Family’s Life

Alissa Ellett Leave a Comment

Invite joy into your family’s life by creating a morning routine. It’s all about pure consistency. Quieting the clutter of the mind and daily rhythms allows your children (and you!) to connect to what God is up to more easily. Share what your mornings are like in the comments below!

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Creating the Best-Ever Morning Routine

Children, like all of us, thrive with healthy structure. A healthy structure is consistent yet adaptable. Our mind and body know what to expect with consistency. And adaptability means we listen to our current needs, notice what is possible at the time and shift in necessary ways.

Life is unpredictable, as are children’s needs. Therefore, a child’s mood, fatigue level, possible illness, hunger level, will, among other things, all affect how routines play out.

Not only do children’s needs affect consistency. Life’s twists and turns do, too. Weather, work, school schedules, travel, family, cars, and all manner of other variables make it impossible to demand perfect adherence to the routines of life.

And, so, we do our best. And that’s enough, always.

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Children Need Presence, Not Perfection

When parents look at their efforts, they often feel guilty. We wish we could give more. More time, more hugs and kisses, more patience, more grace, more fun memories, more locally sourced organic home-cooked meals. More (fill in your blank).

But, guess what? Your kids don’t need you or their life to be perfect. Let yourself off the hook. Having the easiest, most comfortable life isn’t actually what sets any of us up for strength and resilience and hope, anyway.

Your kids need you to be present.

I don’t mean your kids need you to be near them every moment of the day. Instead, your kids need you to notice them, value their experience, be mindful of your relationship with them. From this place of presence, the rest flows with enough to go around.

So, as you consider creating a morning routine with your kids, strive for consistency and presence that informs your adaptability. Ignore unreachable standards. None of us will meet them, and we don’t need to.

Flow with the hopes and needs of today, and let the rest go.

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A Morning Routine Will Revolutionize Your Life

A consistent and adaptable morning routine offers our children and us several precious things, among them is a little more sanity.

A morning routine creates predictability. When children know what to expect, they feel safer and more at ease. This allows for them to handle other things that come their way. With more of their nervous system’s reserve available to them, they are more likely to roll with unforeseen stuff that pops up.

A morning routine grounds us. When adaptive, we help children learn the valuable lesson of paying attention to their needs. We help children learn the art of presence when we offer them opportunities to listen to how they are feeling and then act accordingly.

A morning routine encourages independence. As daily rhythms become familiar, children are more able to carry out tasks on their own. This frees up time for parents, which is always a win. Additionally, children take ownership and pride in caring for themselves, which is a boost for self-confidence.

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A morning routine establishes trust. Children with routines in their lives trust more in the world and others. As routines are created, children learn they can count on things happening. Consequently, as they live within this safety healthy risk-taking and development is possible.

A morning routine means less conflict. When children can care more effectively for themselves and know what to expect, less conflict arises. There is less arguing about what needs to be done. Mornings can be rough, especially with those cranky kids who are more night owls than early birds. So…WIN!

A morning routine eases transitions. Transitions between activities can be difficult for any of us and particularly for children. For example, the change from sleeping to school can be a trying one. With routines established, children can more easily emotionally and mentally prepare for what’s ahead.

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Ideas for Creating Your Child’s Morning Routine

As you consider creating a morning routine with your child, think about the things that must happen. For example, list necessities like:

Eat breakfast
Brush teeth
Brush hair
Get dressed
Check backpack

Then, include something that quenches your soul’s thirst and goes beyond the necessary. Perhaps add a dance party or meditative prayer just before leaving for school.

Being a parent is demanding no matter our life situation. So, don’t forget to incorporate small daily things that bring you joy. The morning is the perfect time to start off doing so.

How will you use your family’s morning routine to connect to God’s life-giving, joy-producing presence this school year? Don’t forget to share in the comments below. We love hearing from you!

To the Outrageously Fabulous Parents with Your Kids in Church: I Salute You

Alissa Ellett Leave a Comment

Having your kids in church with you is hard. And it matters. I promise.

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DOWNLOAD A FREE PDF COPY TO GIVE TO FAMILIES: This is our encouragement letter to all the parents out there, and we think families in your congregations might really enjoy reading it. Click here to download a copy to share with families at your church or parents you know.

You Are Fabulous

To all the parents out there: You are fabulous. Yes, you! I guarantee you that you’re better at raising kids than you often think you are. And all you’re investing in those little humans is already at work in them. This is true even on those days (yes, even those days), when there isn’t even a glimmer of confirmation of that fact.

I see you showing up to church with your arms full. In one hand, the snack bag, a tiny hand in the other and the diaper bag slung over one shoulder. And off you jog after your other little one who’s charging across the parking lot, while shouting back to your oldest, still dawdling, “Lock the car when you get out!”

I know you’re already tired from last night’s less-than-luxurious night of sleep. Yesterday, you were probably at a tournament for your oldest before rushing over to that afternoon swim party.

And, yet, you’re here.

And even when you’re not here…we still think you’re fabulous. We all know that church attendance is not what it was back in the day, and we’re not bemoaning that. Really. We get it. This life stuff…it’s hard. And busy. And filled with many wonderful opportunities for children and youth. And with the schedule of so many families today, sometimes what a family needs more than anything is the chance to just be together on a Sunday morning.

But when you are able to make it to worship, we know the question you might be asking as you pull into the church parking lot…

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“Is It Worth It?!”

You probably wonder if it’s worth it. Does it really matter that you show up at church on Sunday morning? Is it making a difference to anyone that you scramble to get everyone dressed and out the door to be here?

Parenting is hard. It’s so rich and beautiful, lovely and heart-expanding. It’s more than any of us ever imagined it would be. More joyous, more disappointing, more invigorating and more demanding.

And I’m here to tell you that in the midst of all the more-ness of parenting, I’m in awe of you. I don’t need to know you. If you’re the parent who’s reading a blog about having kids in church, I can definitively say I am in awe of you.

And when you invest in having your kids in church – it matters.

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Kids in Church Matters

Kids in church matters to the congregation.

Your family brings with it the gift of your children’s voices. From the sweet sound of their singing to their unassuming (sometimes loud) questions, children invite joy.

When kids are in church, we are all reminded that it’s simply about showing up as we are to worship together. Children’s unfiltered curiosity and authenticity consistently help us let go of our pretense. For this reason, children force us to let go of the notion that worship is an hour-long performance.

Life is messy and unpredictable, and a life of faith isn’t any different. Thank goodness your kids are in church, so we don’t forget that piece of wisdom.

Also, God’s family in it’s most vibrant expression is diverse. So, when we’re all together, we are at our best. We remain the most supple of heart and mind, learning Spirit’s teachings through one another.

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Being in church matters to your kids.

A faith community’s life together is the absolute best teaching tool a church has. Children learn most effectively through observing others. And what better way for them to understand a relationship with God than by watching their spiritual grandparents, parents, aunts, and uncles walk the road?

Having your kids in church teaches them that their presence and their worship matters. When children are a part of worship, we show them that they are enough just the way they are.

Your investment in them, pushing to make it here on Sunday morning is nurturing their faith, showing them what it looks like to love God and how valuable they are, merely by being.

Thank You

And you’re doing it. Great job! And thank you. I share with you my sincere gratitude on behalf of all churches everywhere, because what you’re doing is hard and because it matters to us all.